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Have you ever been on a date and tried to impress the girl with your ALPHA MALE attitude? Well I have and believe me it did not go very well. Maybe I took of a little to harsh with this ALPHA MALE term, but read on, everything unveils nicely. When I’m saying “alpha male” you could very easily compare the term with the animal reign, the alpha-male is that individual in the community witch by endorsing his qualities and personality is considered a leader and fully respected by everyone around him. You know, the animal that gets intercourse with all the ladies, because everyone wants to benefit from his very powerful seed. Now by comparison this is exactly what happens to humans and generally men.

You know it, I know it and most importantly women know it. Ask a woman, what is she looking for in a man (its wise asking an attractive woman). She will generally tell you he has to be funny, quick witted, intelligent, confident, self assured, and of course he has to convey good leadership qualities. Ask yourself now, are you a leader? Chances are if your reading this YOUR NOT. Now this is not necessarily a bad thing, if we were all leaders who were we to LEAD? This is how things work and its called society.

Now going back to my date, I knew women really like leaders and I tried to behave like one, god was I bad. It’s like singing in the shower thinking you actually have skills. You see, women have like a sixth and they “detect” a faker in say about 3-4 minutes of the conversation. You don’t even have to talk (a leader does not feel the need of saying something just to keep things going), it’s in your body language. I really am a no-fan of the “Fake it until you make it!” ideology and every time I tried this it never worked out for me. The date details are not important, what’s important is that I then realized what a mistake I’ve made trying to act ALPHA and strong when in fact I had a bigger chance just conveying my own personality and being sincere.

Now when I’m talking about a needy person I’m referring to a guy that needs constant validation from his love interest, the people around him and usually everyone that he comes in direct contact with. I’m referring to a person girls call bore-friend, that kind of guy witch a girl will hang with “just to be friends”. Now believe me, you don’t want to be NEEDY but trying to act cool/alpha will make you look even worse.

Lets say for example you go on a date with a girl and act real alpha trying to impress her. Now next day you want to call/text her but you make the mistake of thinking that if you do you are going to look needy and don’t. Then she text’s you: “Hey how are you? Remember me?” then you reply in less then 30 seconds: “Hey, I was so very busy I barely had time to breath” but with some twist of fate you happened to be on a break just now and reply this fast.

Or for example you ask for her phone number and she backs out. Now, you don’t want to act needy and pursue it further, you want to play it cool acting like you didn’t even want it anyways. Now what would happen if she did give you her number? Would you had a big grin on your face? Being cool and disinterested are not qualities that one can convey just like that, you need to believe it and then maybe she will believe it.

Being alpha is a difficult quality for a non-alpha to accomplish and trying to be something your not will most likely get you busted. Trying to act alpha sometimes can even become an obsession. Trying not look needy makes you act ahead and plan things you are not supposed to. You can be better of teaching yourself that you don’t need constant validation from someone, that you don’t need this exactly girl to make you happy and that both of you feel good together. She’s not making you any favors and neither are you, it’s a mutual thing.

This is the most important thing you need to understand, its not important how you act its how you really are. Trying to be someone your not will make you look even needier and will completely ruin your game (if you call it a game).

As a matter of fact this is in no way just a post about dating and relationships, its a way of life. The things I’m talking about are to be considered in everyday life with any social circle.